What Causes a Lack of Commitment?

A lot of women were pretty frustrated over this post on one of Cosmo's message boards. And by a lot of women I mean me.

A woman who describes herself as "in a really great, secure relationship of one year" says "it's hard to be openly happy about it because many women around me are in longer relationships, but can't get their guys to commit. It's to the point where it is causing problems for them." Damn right it's causing problems for us!

She theorizes that it might have something to do with the women, since "a guy can seem to hate the idea of commitment with one women that he'll be with for a long time, but when they break up, he'll turn around and get engaged to someone else a month later."

Well, yeah. Because once you lose the closest thing you've ever had to a wife, you consequently feel the biggest emptiness you've felt after a breakup. And that experience is often what makes a man turn around and feel ready to commit to someone.

I'm not saying it's not possible that these women might be lacking something too. For example, we may be lacking the ability to not notice when guys cheat or lie. Or we may be lacking the ability to dress like total hos because we have actual jobs. These are just examples.

Seriously, though, commitment = maturity = loyalty = willpower. Nobody you meet will be perfect, so what makes them feel perfect to you is your emotional outlook. And these men are just not emotionally ready. That's all there is to it.